Embrace Disappointment, Embrace Silence

“There are insights and emotions that can find you in no other way than through silence and within silence.”  - Susan Scott, “Fierce Conversations”

Atacama, Chile.  A place of solitude where I have embraced that fierce,
internal conversation in life's disappointments.

If you take risks, you will endure disappointment.  Perhaps you will fail yourself or fail someone else. Maybe someone will fail to keep a commitment to you. The timing of your new venture will be wrong. Your new product launch won't catch fire.

When disappointment comes, you won’t like what you feel. When it comes, you likely will be more than a bit inconsolable. When it arrives, you likely won’t be proud of your behavior. You may sulk.  You may withdraw initially.  You may play the role of a victim.

Is there a way to avoid disappointment? Absolutely not. Not if you intend to make an impact or achieve some work that is really worthwhile.

So buck it up. When disappointment comes, take Susan Scott’s advice and move into what feels like an even more dangerous place than disappointment – silence. Sit with your questions. Refuse to self-medicate your unease. Allow for a pause. 

Why?

Because in silence will come a new way of accepting your part in your failures. In quiet you will gain clarity and find new direction. In the pause of life you will find a recommitment to your vision, purpose and desire to make an impact.

What choice is there for you anyway?  You won’t settle for failure and you won’t settle for no impact in life.  At your very core, you sense you must make a significant, positive impact in life. So embrace disappointment and move on with renewed knowledge and intensity!

30 Almonds

Explora Hotel Salto Chico in Patagonia

When I first arrived at the lodge, “Rosario” reviewed some of my dietary preferences, to ensure my meals would be to my liking during my stay.  “Impressive attention to customer needs,” I thought as she asked me questions and I gave her specific requests for my lunches. 

When I returned on the first day from an all-day hike, Rosario met me at the door and asked me how my lunch was.  I told her it was perfect in every way, but I joked that I did not need so many almonds as I had been given. “How much is the right amount?” she asked. “30 almonds is perfect,” I answered. 

When I sat down the next day to eat my lunch out on the trail, I thought, “I wonder how many almonds will be this bag?” I counted them.  …27…28…29…30. 

30 almonds. 

When I returned on the second day to the lodge, Rosario again asked me about my lunch. “Was it to your liking?” She smiled knowingly when I told her I was astounded that there were 30 almonds in my lunch.  Not 29, not 31, but 30.  She smiled. “It was nothing.”

It is easy to sing the praises of Rosario (and I have already done that).  In reality though, she is part of a team.  Her part is important, but it is not the most important part.  She is the “face” of a team of people who truly understand that there is more to lunch preparation than counting almonds.   Lunch preparation and counting almonds is about delighting customers.

On every team, it is the people in the background that carry the heavy water when it comes to delighting customers.   If people are valued as “just cooks” or “only clerks” or “order pullers,” your team is doomed to mediocre service to customers.  But when these “background people” are valued as the “Chief Officers for Delighting Customers,” they will take on the mission with a passion and their work will be meaningful as well.

Don’t let the cooks, the clerks, or the folks in the warehouse think their work is not properly valued, because in reality, they are not counting almonds. They are fulfilling the lifelong dreams of clients.

Above is video of the view from the top of the French Valley in Parque Nacional Torres del Paine.


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